naively_h (naively_h) wrote in hwritesd,

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Ring, ring, why don't you give me a call?

D -

My darling, dearest, drunkest D. You really are quite a sight when you are off your face. Your singing was the absolute highlight of my evening. Who knew that your knew EVERY word of Abba's Mamma Mia. What a gift you have, your voice is like the silk of Malfoy's bedsheets. Not that I've ever been on them. Blaise promised me that it was his bed, not that slimeball.

I have only 'drunk' a few times in my life, and I am yet to feel any ill effect either during or after the episodes. No matter how sloshed Seamus tried to get me, there was no effect what so ever. Actually kind of a let down. Still, he managed to get rightly off his tits and told me the most facinating things about Dean...let's just say he's rather limber for a boy of his size. That Seamus...his sexual appetite never seems to end. I remember one particular time we were on his bed and he was so pissed he just kept trying to grab...well me. But everything seemed to be in slow motion for him and I ended up just having to bind his arms to the bed. What a drag. Then of course there was the whole logistical issue of getting his clothes off and so on. All I can say is, carpet burn all round.

But getting back on topic, I never get drunk. Perhaps it's some Voldemort power cast off? The only thing that happens is that I have vivid dreams. Like last night. I seem to recall having one about a blonde haired beauty. He was sitting in a forest of flowers. Everywhere, in bloom, it was lovely. Anyway, I thought he was wearing a blue robe, but when I got closer I realized he was covered in flowers. Then a light breeze came through and all the flowers were blown off him, revealing his...assests. I was embarressed for him, of course. I mean...all his flowers had gone, poor guy. So I rushed over to help him, as anyone would, and I noticed I was wearing a cloak of red flowers. And naked blonde guy says to me, 'Water my garden any time baby.'

I thought, wow, a person who is concered with the environment, how lovely. So of course, I helped him out with his watering situation. You know, sowing my wild oats in his sweet, soft holes. Filling his pots to satisfaction. It was all rather interesting. I woke and I must have cast a watering charm cause my sheets were all damp. Weird, huh?

Until next time,

 - H

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